Loki: Ragnarok and Roll #1
Written by Eric M. Esquivel | Art by Jerry Gaylord
Dave: Upside-down crosses as pasties, a tied-up chick getting it on with a girl in a nun costume, physical exertion sex humor…looks like the Panels in Poor Taste team was called just in time!
Sean: Oh, I was already here. I didn’t realize this was Panels in Poor Taste. Shit, I should probably pull my pants up. #BeatTheWorldSerpent
Sam: “Wanna play?” I’m pretty sure we had a panel last week talking about a late night game with similar subject matter. Maybe a Zenescope book is tying into this…what a subtle crossover!
Dog: I guess King Diamond was wrong. Nuns DO have fun!
Green Lantern: New Guardians #28
Written by Justin Jordan | Art by Brad Walker
Dave: That has to be one of the coolest landing strips I’ve ever seen.
Sean: What is this, the 70s?
Dog: Is “hinder made of angel hair” one of Facebook’s 50 gender identities? If not, I expect a strongly worded blog post from a certain shimmering humanoid.
B.P.R.D. Hell on Earth #116
Written by Mike Mignola | Art by James Harren
Dave: Why did Harren have to make the giant monster baby so darn cute!? I weep at his eye gouge.
Sean: No, don’t kill it, it just wants to play patty cake!
Dog: I didn’t know Tarantino was directing the long-gestating Encino Man sequel.
Harley Quinn #3
Written by Amanda Conner | Art by Chad Hardin
Dave: Since they share a mouth, they must be [insert cunnilingus joke here].
Sean: One of them looks like a baby, Dave. That’s not cool. That’s super statutory.
Dog: Not one of Russell Stover’s best advertisements…
Amazing X-Men #4
Written by Jason Aaron | Art by Ed McGuinness
Dog: And a little Zithromax can clear it right up.
Dave: “This is why we a can’t get Mexican!” was the original thought bubble there. Stupid editors.
Sean: Carrot Top’s mom is pissed!
Written by Mike Johnson | Art by Mahmud Asrar
Dave: Gotta love the Scottish and their ability to stay cool but also be cool (with hiding their junk). That said, they really missed out on a teaching moment there for the kids: “and the villain has exposed testes which make babies, see?”
Sean: I am really glad we don’t get to see his purple soldier.
Dog: I always wondered what it would look like if Krang had a kid with Stretch Armstrong.
Female Force #8: Barbara Walters
Written by Robert Schnakenberg | Art by Vinnie Tartamella
Dave: Who is the man pretending to be Barbara Walters in the second panel!? Somebody get a reporter on this…maybe Walters? I don’t know, is she even alive?
Sean: “As to the accusations that I have a stand in who is actually a man, on days when I’m at the spa, well, that is just preposterous.”
Dog: If “paying dues” is code for “made a deal with Satan,” I suddenly understand the inclusion of crazy anti-vaxxer Jenny McCarthy on the show.
Animal Man #28
Written by Jeff Lemire | Art by Rafael Albuquerque
Dave: Aside from this sending weird vibes down the back of my neck…did that dude have horns for eyes?!
Sean: Wait…yeah. Hold up a second. He did have horns for eyes! What the hell kind of sense does that make! How does he see?! Does he go by scent primarily, like a snake, or by echolocation, like a bat?
Dog: Maybe they’re fat whiskers and he feels around in the dark with his face.
Sam: All he ever wanted was a hug from his childhood hero Animal Man.