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Comic Books

Panels in Poor Taste: 7/4/14 – Independence Day Edition

Witchblade #176

Written by Ron Marz | Art by Laura Braga

Dave: Now that’s what I call fisting.

Dog: This must be the pointiest page in the history of comics. I’d be afraid of papercuts just handling it.

Chaos #3

Written by Tim Seeley | Art by Mirka Andolfo

Dave: Jack Kirby Rule #47: Never miss an opportunity for a side boob shot. NEVER.

Dog: One guy screws up and now everyone has to watch front axle impalement videos when applying for a motorcycle license.

Scum of the Earth #1

Written by Mark Bertolini | Art by Rob Croonenborghs

Dave: Deleted scene from The Good, The Bad, and the Spaghetti Head.

Dog: Another intact eyeball ejection! Is this something 21st century “How to Draw Comics” books really harp on? “You’ll never work if you can’t do an IEE!”

Robocop #1

Written by Joshua Williamson | Art by Carlos Magno

Dog: “You wanna draw Robocop? Lots of IEEs.”

Dave: Now that’s what I call an ocular patdown.

Sidekick #7

Written by J. Michael Straczynski | Art by Tom Mandrake

Dave: Air traffic control must be pissed about this one.

Dog: It’s like that scene from E.T., except there’s no bicycle and the basket is his crotch.

The Field #3

Written by Ed Brisson | Art by Simon Roy

Dave: I’m not sure what’s more disturbing, the bat’leth being used to maim or that load in the dude’s underwear.

Dog: I guess when we finally decided to become a soccer country this year, hooliganism was part of the deal. Nice to see we could add the guns and dead animals for our own, nationalistic style. Happy Independence Day!

Lazarus #9

Written by Greg Rucka | Art by Michael Lark

Dave: Jesus guy, just stab her and be done with it, don’t fondle her kidneys!

Dog: “Give me your tired, your poor, your tangled intestines yearning to spill free.” USA USA USA!

Hack/Slash: Son Of Samhain #1

Written by Michael Moreci | Art by Steve Seeley

Dave: Nightmare fuel.

Dog: I’ll be damned, the worms DO play pinochle on your snout.

East of West #13

Written by Jonathan Hickman | Art by Nick Dragotta

Dave: Maybe cover him up with a sheet or something? Kind of intimate seeing his esophagus and all.

Dog: “Yeah, yeah, dead dad; where did you get that placental bean bag chair? I need a birthday gift for a biology student.”


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