Worthless peasants – it is I, Doom, your ruler, master, and resident genius of AIPT!
You may cease genuflecting now.
Doom has taken over the review writing duties from the previous milksop Patrick, in order to ensure this review goes off without error or complication.
Many of you ask, is this comic good? Is it worth my expense? Doom is so above the petty needs of the simpletons, that spending a few billion Latverian dollars (exchange rates are hell) to buy this issue is but an afterthought to Doom. Still, Doom understands that many of you are weighing how to budget your income. To put it another way – if it comes to buying formula for your baby, or paying for Doom, you must always choose Doom.
Your baby could lose a few pounds anyway.
The review belongs to Doom now. WE BEGIN:
Infamous Iron Man #1 (Marvel Comics)
Doom is better looking that Robert Downey Jr, SO SAYS DOOM!
(Patrick here – while Victor is off gazing at his recently fixed face in the mirror for the 20th time this hour, let me quickly set the scene here. Doom’s face is fixed–we all know that. He seems to be the same in terms of pure magical power, and technological know how, but slightly softened–which could be a combination of Richards being off in some other galaxy (read: exiled by Marvel Studios) and his new face, or maybe he just listened to a bunch of Deepak Chopra. Who knows. Here, he’s done stroking his chin, let’s see how he picks this up.)
The profile of Doom is so stunning, super villainesses want him, super villains want to be him. SO SAYS DOOM.
Serfs! Cease your crying – Doom has returned to allow you to gaze at both beauty and intelligence. Let us answer the ongoing question, in bold. DOOM TYPES IN NO OTHER FORMAT.
Is It Good?
Doom knows you will all suspect him of being biased, but Doom is the best judge of character on the planet. Look at Reed Richards! Doom always knew he would leave this world in its hour of need, and where is he now? Doom must find him, and tell him of these things!
First, Doom will say this: with Iron Man gone, only Doom has the intelligence, good looks, ego, and drive to take up his mantle and save the world from its own stupidity and its slow slide into a reality TV wasteland. DOOM WILL DO IT FOR YOU EVEN THOUGH YOU DON’T DESERVE DOOM.
PATRICK – FINISH THIS REVIEW FOR DOOM!
So yes, this is great. Doom’s strength has always been that he honestly thinks that he is the hero of the story, and that all the various setbacks and hero attacks he’s been subject to over his life are simply what a man of his greatness has to put up with to survive in a world filled with morons. Look at this exchange:
OF COURSE YOU ARE A DOOM FAN, YOU’RE BREATHING AND NOT WITH THE HELP OF A MACHINE.
DOOM IS AN AUTUMN AND LOOKS BEST IN EARTH TONES
What The Hood doesn’t seem to understand is that Doom needs to prove himself is inside his own psyche. Just like Batman can’t stop being a Dark Knight when Joe Chill is dead, locked up, or 11 other various retcons, Doom is now always Doom. Even with a repaired face, the ego and intellect that pushed Victor to become this half mad wizard technocrat is not going away anytime soon. Now, with Tony Stark gone, he can try to beat the heroes at their own game, proving that all the misunderstandings of the past were not his fault.
In short, this issue is fantastic. I’m not a huge Maleev fan, because I think that his art is just too dark and hazy for my tastes. He does a great job redesigning Doom/Iron-Doom to fit this narrative though, so props there.
As far as the plot, Doom has always been one of my favorite figures in Marvel, and this might be his real chance to shine. When you have heroes like Wolverine and Punisher murdering the bad guys, is Doom really that distant from them? He’s like an anti-Black Panther; he’s continued to keep his tiny nation in the main flow of the UN, and his populace is like the anti- North Korea. A well fed and prosperous nation, TERRIFIED of its leader.
I’m super excited about this book, this new leaf for Doom and Iron Man, and hopefully seeing this green hooded bastard make some super-heroes look like schmucks.
WHATEVER WAS TYPED ABOVE, DOOM APPROVES. BUY DOOM’S BOOK OR ANGER DOOM.